Tog's and Trumpets

I went to my local shopping centre yesterday, its like Manchester Arndale but without the parking problems and much smaller. It has everything you need which is good for me because I hate Manchester town centre with a vengeance. My original intent was to get my eyes tested but try as I might I couldn’t find the opticians. That’s the one drawback with the mini Arndale. They are always moving the shops around, I think the guy that runs it must be an ex supermarket manager, you just get used to the shops being in a certain place and he changes the landscape to the point where you need a new map. I couldn’t have read it anyway; I need my eyes testing.

So I decided to treat myself to a couple of new shirts and anything else that caught my eye, my good one that is. I always shop for my clothes at the same place, unless I am abroad where everything is so cheap I buy six of everything. I have been going to this establishment for years, actually I think that it’s the only shop that hasn’t been moved by the mad supermarket manager. They know me and give great service despite being a little pricey. The manageress is about thirty-five, which is getting on for my cut off point age wise, so her shelf life is limited, but she is an extremely beautiful woman and has a very pleasant manner which is just borderline flirtatious.

However she does have an enormous bottom, its not just big its huge, its a wonder to me how she carries it around, in every other respect she is perfectly proportioned, there was definitely a cock up in the administration department when the trumpets were being handed out. But credit where its due, she has the most wonderful smile and when Im not looking at her bum, which I definitely don’t need glasses for, I am looking at her pearly white teeth framed by soft scarlet lips.
I suppose you think I'm superficial but one has to be realistic where affairs of the arse, sorry heart are concerned and as I mentioned in an earlier post, I'm not getting any younger.

I spent a good deal more than I had intended to, but they had a sale on and I took advantage of it. So much so that when the time came to pay she asked me if I was going anywhere special, I replied in the negative and put on my sad face, "haven’t been out for ages I lied" me too, she said, I could do with a good night out. Oh well if I decide to try my new togs out this weekend I’ll give you a ring I joked, Really she smiled, well it will have to be Saturday night, I work during the day.

I was gob smacked. I never intended this, I was just joking, it was a friendly quip. So now I have a date that I don't really want, her face is saying go for it, but her arse is saying whoa there I’ll never fit in the car. I felt really bad about all this until last night, when I watched a film that changed my mind, its called Shallow Hal with Jack Black. Its a very funny film with a very direct and meaningful message, anyway I changed my mind, I thought why not, most men would climb a mountain for that smile, come to think of it I may well have to.