Idiots beget idiots.

My little hamlet was buzzing last night with the news that the decomposing body of a twenty to thirty year old man had been found in some undergrowth at the bottom of Northridge road. He hasn’t as yet been identified, but police are treating the death as suspicious. I think I would too, nothing much happens on Northridge road. Its quite boring as roads go, and certainly not the kind of place one would go to commit suicide, at least not if one wanted to go out in a blaze of glory and certainly not in undergrowth near the M60 motorway.

Elsewhere a man was rescued by fire fighters after getting tangled in a length of razor wire which had been abandoned on a roadway in Greater Manchester. Fire crews from Bolton were called out to St James Street in Farnworth shortly after 0300 BST following reports that a man had become caught up in the wire. The fire fighters had to use bolt cutters to free him. The man was taken to hospital following his release for treatment to cuts.

I have questions! When did we stop calling firemen, firemen and start calling them fire-fighters, is this another import from the US of A. I’m not arguing that fire fighting is what they do. I mean whom better to fight a fire than firemen; they have the training, the equipment, in some cases the need to fight fires. But if we are changing names here just for the sake of it or perhaps because it sounds more dramatic. Then why not “cat stuck in tree getter downers”, or “people trapped in car getter outers”, or “kid with head fast in railings unstickers” or even “men entangled in razor wire rescuers”.

I have issue with the word abandoned too, at least in this context, what’s wrong with the good old fashioned word dumped, To abandon one must have had intent to do something other than abandon before the said act. There must have been plans, intentions, ideas to do other than abandon before a change of mind or series of events that subsequently leads one to abandon.

And what idiot upon encountering abandoned razor wire in the middle of the road decides that it would be a good idea to play with it. Thus risking serious harm to himself and possibly the heroic fire-fighters that would inevitably have to be called to free him from the friendless razor wire. I put it to you Me-Lud that the chap entangled in the wire was the person responsible for trying to abandon/dump said wire in the first place. And if that not be the case then the only other explanation for him wearing the wire is that he came upon it by accident and being a thief chose not to inform the appropriate authorities, but to steal the wire for his own use.

If the first case be true, then he is just an inconsiderate idiot. If the second case be true then he is just an inconsiderate, dangerous, fly tipping idiot. If the third case be true then he is an inconsiderate opportunist idiot thief. Whichever way you look at it he is an idiot.

Just another typical day in Manchester. Uncut grass is swaying in the breeze, old trainers are dangling from telephone wires, kids are sitting astride bikes in the middle of the road daring you to run them over, house proud Neighbours are putting new cardboard up at the windows after the weeks rain
And abandoned (I use the word cautiously) and battered housewives are hoping against hope that the body found is that of the man they swore their marriage vows to in a time when they knew no better. .